FLICK.
just let it go.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Clemens Pulls Out of Hope Prematurely

On Monday Roger Clemens pulled out of the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic faster than a hypodermic needle from a buttock. Clemens, a two-time winner of the Hope pro-am, won’t be able to make his opening round tee time on Jan. 16 because it conflicts with his appearance at the Congressional hearing to investigate the findings of former Senator George Mitchell’s report on performance-enhancing drugs in baseball.

Pulling out of the Hope is just another case of bad timing for the Rocket, who waited nearly a month before publicly responding to his former trainer Brian McNamee’s allegations that he injected Clemens with steroids in 1998, 2000, and 2001. In his defense, the Rocket has since blasted off with a full arsenal of name-clearing tactics: initial statements released through his lawyers, then the Internet video denial, the “60 Minutes” interview, and finally Monday’s bizarre press conference which featured a taped phone conversation between McNamee and Clemens. To top off his monumental profession of innocence, Clemens’ legal team also filed suit in Texas charging McNamee with defamation.

What a joke that the House Oversight Committee feels compelled to put Clemens and other players like Clemens’ friend and former Yankees and Astros teammate Andy Pettitte on parade. Let the Rat save some time (and taxpayers’ money) with a news flash: lots of baseball players have injected performance-enhancing drugs and popped pills like candy. Or Vioxx “like they were skittles,” as Clemens did. Baseball’s dirty secret is now (over)exposed; stringent drug testing is in place (though the Rat agrees with Mitchell in thinking that baseball would be best served by an independent lab like WADA), and cheaters are punished. Case closed.

We don’t need any more political grandstanding and Congressional finger wagging. The stench of baseball’s dirty laundry is already overpowering. What’s the point of airing it out again? The Rat wonders why Congress can take time to grill a bunch of overpaid athletes, but can’t pass a spending bill, much less address real issues like immigration laws and health care reform.

The Mitchell Report offered several common sense suggestions to strengthen baseball’s drug testing program, but it also recommended that baseball not get caught up in trying to retroactively punish players. Accept the fact that mistakes were made and steroids were a problem, but adopt a policy of forgiveness and allow the game to move on with a clean slate.

And seriously, leave the Rocket alone. He may be a megalomaniacal mercenary, but it’s that warrior mentality that has helped him overpower and dominate batters for the last twenty-four years. Out here in the desert, we like it when our heroes wear black hats and are a little mean and intimidating. Especially a hero as successful as Clemens, who’s won 354 games and seven Cy Young awards in a superlative career in Boston, Toronto, New York, and Houston.

Roger, we know you “don’t give a rat’s ass about the Hall of Fame,” but the Rat will give you the benefit of the doubt. You said you deserved at least that much, and you’re right. The Rat is also shocked and angered at the all-too-American reaction of “guilty until proven innocent.” Even if it turns out you’re dirtier than the dirty rat who killed my brother, you’re still the greatest pitcher of our generation. Granted, that generation is the Steroid Era, but let’s let bygones be bygones. Let’s move on without further tarnishing the game. No matter what happens, you’ve got the Rat’s support for a first-ballot Cooperstown plaque whenever you stop unretiring. In the meantime, give ‘em hell in Washington next Wednesday, and then head for the friendlier confines of La Quinta to play golf on Thursday, Friday and Saturday.

Bob Hope Chrysler Classic Tournament director Mike Milthorpe is just one among the many of us who hope to see you there.
FLICK. just let it go.